120 Great Financial Questions for Married Couples

What financial questions should you ask as a married couple?

Discussing money can sometimes be a touchy subject among couples, especially those who are already married.

But if you and your partner are ever going to be on the same page when it comes to money, you need to have those tough discussions sooner rather than later.

Whether you’re trying to achieve a new financial goal or overcome a financial obstacle, or you’re ready to dig into your family’s finances together, having a few good conversations about money is the first step.

But getting those conversations started can be difficult.

These 120+ financial questions for married couples are a great way to inspire conversations to help you and your partner whip your finances into shape.

premarital counseling financial questions


Before we dive into these money questions…

Why Should Married Couples Talk About Money?

The stress that often comes along with talking about money could be enough to keep you from having financial discussions with your spouse.

But there are a variety of great reasons to push past your fears to take the time to discuss money with your partner.

Here are the top three reasons why every married couple should talk about money. 

1) Your family’s finances affect both of you.

Whether or not you both handle your family’s finances, the money you have, or the debt you incur affects both of you.

As a married couple, you are LEGALLY responsible for each of your financial obligations, which means you need to be aware of all the money that comes into and goes out of your household.

I have some married friends who never discussed their finances because they kept everything separate. 

The problem with never talking about money, even if you’re separate is that it can lead to misunderstandings and surprises. 

Imagine finding out about a huge credit card bill or a secret savings account when it’s too late. Yikes!

Not only that, but avoiding money talks can also create a wedge in your relationship. 

Trust me, you don’t want to be the couple arguing over bills when you could be planning your next vacation instead. 

So, even if you keep separate accounts, make sure you’re both in the loop about the big picture. 

Communication is key to a happy, financially healthy marriage!

2) Financial indiscretions are a form of infidelity.

If your partner hides aspects of their finances from you, this indiscretion can not only jeopardize your financial future but also your relationship.

To maintain trust in your relationship, being open and honest about money is essential.

Having a conversation about what is expected of both of you when it comes to financial obligations is a good first step. 

But it’s also important to keep the conversation going by discussing your family’s finances regularly.

3) Talking about money could make you more satisfied in your marriage.

Having an open and honest discussion about money with your spouse may seem like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

And when you feel like you can trust your partner when it comes to money, you may also feel like you’re able to trust them more in other aspects of your marriage, such as making big life decisions together, planning for the future, and just feeling more connected overall.

Imagine the peace of mind knowing that you’re on the same page financially, supporting each other’s goals and dreams. 

So, grab a cup of coffee, sit down, and start those money talks – your marriage will thank you!

financial questions to ask your partner

120+ Money Questions For Couples

Okay, so now that you’re ready to sit down and talk about your finances with your spouse, you might be wondering exactly where you should start. 

I’ve broken these 85 financial questions for couples into categories. 

  • Background Questions About Money
  • Questions About Your Money Management Style and Situation
  • Questions About Your Debt
  • Day-To-Day Financial Questions
  • Money Questions About Your Future
  • Fun Money Questions To Ask Your Partner. 

I’ve bolded the financial questions I think are particularly important.

financial questions for couples

Background Questions About Money

Whether you and your partner have talked about finances before or not, there are likely still some things you don’t know about each other’s financial habits and preferences.

These simple questions will help you learn more about what your partner knows about budgeting and how they typically manage their own money.

From learning about their family’s relationship with money to understanding what money means to them, these questions can help get the conversation started when it comes to finances in your relationship.

1) Did your family talk about money together when you were growing up?

2) Were you aware of how much money your parents made when you were a child?

3) Did both of your parents work?

4) Do you think your parents did a good job managing their money?

5) Did your parents buy you everything you wanted or did they tell you when they couldn’t afford something?

6) Is there anything you would change about the way your parents dealt with money while you were a child?

7) Did your family go on vacations when you were young? Where did you go?

8) Who taught you about managing money?

9) Did you get an allowance when you were growing up? What did you do with that money?

10) How did your family handle financial emergencies or unexpected expenses?

11) What was your first experience with earning money, and how did it impact your view on finances?

12) Did your family have any specific financial traditions or habits, like saving change in a jar or having money talks at dinner?

13) How did your family celebrate financial milestones, like a promotion or paying off a big debt?

14) Were you encouraged to save your own money or spend it on things you wanted as a child?

15) How did your family approach giving to charity or helping others financially?

16) What was your first big purchase, and how did you feel about it?

17) Did you ever have to work to contribute to household expenses growing up?

18) How did your parents’ financial habits influence your views on credit cards and loans?

19) What financial advice, if any, did you receive from your family growing up?

20) Do you have any bad memories from growing up that are associated with money?

21) What’s the biggest money mistake you’ve made and what did you learn from it?

22) What’s the best financial lesson you have learned?

23) What do you wish you knew about money when you were growing up that you know now?

financial questions for couples with kids

Questions About Your Money Management Style

The next set of questions is all about learning how your spouse manages their money because it can be a very personal preference.

But to be on the same page about money in your relationship, you need to be able to talk about how you manage your money.

These personal financial questions for married couples will help you get the ball rolling when it comes to talking about money with your partner.

24) What scares you about money?

25) What does having money mean to you?

26) What does being good with money mean to you?

27) How do you manage your money?

28) What financial habits do you practice regularly to maintain your financial health?

29) How far ahead do you usually plan financially?

30) Do you follow a budget?

31) What tools or apps do you use for managing your finances?

32) How do you prioritize your spending when it comes to essentials vs. non-essentials?

33) Are you a spender or a saver?

deep questions about money

34) When you get a little extra money, what do you usually do with it? Spend it or save it?

35) What’s your approach to paying bills? Do you pay them as soon as they come in, or do you have a set schedule?

36) How do you handle unexpected expenses or financial emergencies?

37) What’s your strategy for saving money? Do you follow a specific savings plan?

38) How do you approach long-term financial planning, like saving for retirement or buying a house?

39) Do you set financial goals for yourself? If so, how do you work towards achieving them?

40) How often do you review your financial situation and make adjustments?

41) What’s your philosophy on investing money?

42) How do you balance short-term spending with long-term financial goals?

43) What’s your approach to charitable giving or donating money?

44) Would you ever accept financial help from family?

45) Would you ever consider helping a family member financially?

46) What steps do you take to save money when you need to cut back on your spending?

47) How much is too much to spend on shoes, a vacation, a car, a house, etc.?

48) Do you want to talk to me about my spending? Do I want to talk to you about your spending?

49) Do you believe you are paid fairly at your job?

50) Do you plan on staying in the same job or will you look for a new job sometime in the future?

51) Do you feel financially responsible for our family?

52) Should we have an equal say in our finances, even if one person makes more money than the other?

53) If I spent $100 on something and didn’t tell you, would you be mad?

54) What will we do if we disagree about our family’s finances or a big purchase?

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I’m excited to share it, as I spent a ridiculously exorbitant amount of time putting this together. This is the final version after many many versions. If you’re interested in purchasing this spreadsheet, you can click here to get a 15% off coupon.

Questions About Your Debt

Debt can be a significant part of your financial picture, and understanding each other’s debt situation is crucial for a healthy financial relationship.

 Whether it’s student loans, credit card balances, or a mortgage, discussing your debt openly can help you plan and manage it together. 

These questions are designed to help you both get a clear view of your debt, how you handle it, and how it impacts your overall financial health. 

By being honest about your debt, you can support each other in finding strategies to manage and eventually eliminate it.

55) How do you feel about debt?

56) Do you believe there is good and bad debt?

57) What types of debt do you currently have (e.g., student loans, credit cards, mortgage)?

58) Do you have debt that I’m not aware of?

59) If you do have debt, how do you feel about it?

60) If you have debt, how are you taking care of it?

61) How do you stay motivated to pay off debt?

62) How much debt do you think is acceptable for our family?

63) Do you typically carry a credit card balance?

64) Do you prefer buying things with cash or credit?

65) Are there any debt-related goals you have for our family, such as becoming debt-free by a certain age?

66) Have you ever experienced financial stress due to debt? If so, how did you cope with it?

67) What’s your plan if we encounter a financial emergency and need to take on additional debt?

68) Are you comfortable with taking on new debt for major purchases, like a car or home renovation?

questions to ask significant other

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Day-to-Day Financial Questions

One of the best ways to ensure you and your partner are both in agreement when it comes to your family’s finances is to talk about how your money will be handled on a day-to-day basis.

These questions will help you and your partner come up with a plan for managing your family’s money.

Whether you already follow a budget or are just getting started with a financial plan for your family, discussing the answers to these questions can help you figure out a money management method that works for both of you.

69) What do you like about the way we have been managing our money so far?

70) Is there anything you would change about the way we handle money as a couple?

71) Should we combine our money or keep it separate? Why?

72) Who will manage the family’s finances day to day?

73) Who will be responsible for paying the bills?

74) How will we keep track of our income and spending?

75) What type of budget should we use?

76) Will we work together to create a budget?

77) How will we keep track of our budget throughout the month?

78) What percentage of our income should we dedicate to monthly bills?

79) What percentage of our income should we dedicate toward savings?

80) What percentage of our income should we dedicate to retirement and investments?

81) How much money should we have in our emergency fund?

82) How much can we each spend without the need to consult each other?

83) Will we donate any of our money on a regular basis? To who? How much?

84) If you currently have a budget, what would you change about it?

85) How will we handle large purchases? Will we make purchases using a credit or save up and pay cash?

86) What are ways you can reduce your spending?

87) Are there ways to increase your income?

88) When will we talk about money next? How often will we discuss the budget?

89)How often should we review our spending habits to ensure we stay on track with our budget?

90) How will we manage financial discrepancies or disagreements when they arise?

91) How do we plan to handle seasonal expenses, like holiday shopping or summer vacations?

good finance questions to ask

Money Questions About Your Future

Planning for your future is a big part of any marriage.

That means you need to discuss those future plans with your partner.

From saving for retirement to realizing your dreams, there are a variety of ways money figures into your family’s future plans. These simple money questions about your future will help you and your partner figure out a plan for your money so you both know exactly what your money will be used for when the time comes.

92) Who will manage the long-term finances for the family?

93) Should we manage our retirement and investment accounts on our own or hire someone to do it?

94) What is our plan for health care and long-term care as we age?

95) Do we have adequate life insurance and health insurance coverage?

96) What are our long-term savings goals?

97) Will we be saving for our children’s college education?

98) When do you want to retire?

99) What do you expect our retirement to look like? How do we need to plan to make that a reality?

100) Do we need to start or add to our retirement?

1011) Are there any things to consider financially as our parents get older?

102) Do you expect to get an inheritance from your family? How will that factor into our future budget?

103) Will we be leaving any money behind when we die? Should we make arrangements now?

104) Do we need to make any big purchases (like a new house or car) in the near future?

105) What would we do if one of us lost our job?

106) How do we plan to address potential changes in our financial situation, such as a significant raise, promotion, or job relocation?

107) Are there any career changes or educational pursuits we anticipate, and how will they affect our finances?

108) How often should we revisit and revise our long-term financial goals and plans?

109) When we have children, will we both continue working? Will one of us stay home with the kids? If so, who will stay home and who will work?

110) If we already have children, is our current situation (of who is working or staying at home) ideal? If not, what would be ideal?

111) Should our kids get a regular allowance? How much?

questions to ask about money management

Fun Money Questions to Ask Your Partner

Not all conversations about money have to be serious!

Spending money can be fun, which means there are tons of fun things to talk about when it comes to your family’s finances.

Asking your partner these fun money questions will help you understand how they manage their money when it comes to fun purchases.

Plus, it’s a great way to talk about future plans and goals you both can consider when you have a little bit of extra money to spend.

112) If you won the lottery, what’s the first thing you would purchase?

113) If money was no object, what is one thing you have always dreamed of doing or buying?

114) What is something big you would like us to save for?

115) What’s the next vacation you would like to take?

116) What do you want our life to look like in 10 years?

117) How much can we spend as fun money each month?

118) What do you like to spend your fun money on?

119) What’s one splurge you’ll never give up?

120) What would it take for you to be happy about our financial situation?

121) If you had an extra $1,000 this month, what would you do with it?

122) What are your dreams or goals in life?

123) Do you think we’re on track to help you achieve those goals? How can I help you achieve them?

Tips for Talking with Your Spouse About Money

Now that you know how important having the money talk with your spouse can be and many money questions for couples, you’re probably wondering how to get started.

Since discussing money and finances can sometimes be a difficult conversation to have, being prepared is a good idea.

Remember, whether you and your partner have struggled with money issues in the past or you want to address the issue before it becomes a problem, talking about money with your husband or wife is the first step toward financial success as a couple.

These simple tips will help start the conversation and ensure it goes smoothly.

1) Set a date

Since talking about money is serious business, it’s a good idea to avoid springing these tough questions on your partner without advanced notice.

Instead, let them know that you want to set aside time to talk about money. You’ll both have a chance to think about the topics you want to discuss and have time to prepare yourselves for the conversation.

I find the best environment to discuss these questions is in a weekly marriage meeting. If you haven’t already established one, here’s everything you need to know to start a weekly marriage meeting, including the agenda.

2) Make it fun

Talking about money can get serious pretty quickly.

Instead of setting yourselves up for a depressing conversation, try to make the discussion fun.

Head out to your favorite restaurant or grab a cup of coffee to lighten the mood before you get into the serious stuff.

Sometimes, starting with fun questions is also a great way to break the ice!

financial discussions for couples

3) Think “we” instead of “me”

Tackling the conversation of money in terms of “we” is a great way to show your partner that you want to work together.

Using the words we and us when talking about your family’s finances will ensure you avoid accusations and instead show a united front.

This is especially important now that you’re married because remember that your finances affect both of you and your entire family! 

4) Recognize triggers

Everyone has certain items that trigger them when they’re discussing serious topics – especially when it comes to money.

To keep the conversation from becoming heated, take the time to recognize each other’s triggers.

If you notice your partner is getting upset about a topic, take a break. Give yourself and your partner time to calm down, then come back to the table to discuss the topic more rationally.

5) Don’t talk about everything at once

Talking about money should be an ongoing part of your marriage.

That means you don’t need to cover every money topic all in one sitting. Break down your money talks into different conversations to make the discussion a little easier to handle.

In addition to allowing you to cover every aspect of your family’s money management thoroughly, it will also give you and your partner plenty of time to discuss everything you want to know about how each of you deals with money.

6) Make it part of your routine

Once you have the big money talk, don’t stop talking about your family’s money.

Making financial discussions part of your routine is a great way to stay on the same page about your finances.

Take the time to go over the family budget together and discuss upcoming expenses.

Plus, it doesn’t hurt to regularly review your long-term financial goals to ensure they are staying at the front of both your minds and continue to take steps toward those goals! 

Being open about money on a regular basis will prevent surprises and fights from happening in the future.

7) Ask lots of questions

Questions are the best way to get more information and learn more about a situation.

That’s why asking your partner questions when it comes to money is one of the best ways to work through a stressful situation.

8) Get outside help

It’s okay to seek external help to facilitate these conversations. 

Reading books on financial planning, talking to an accountant, or consulting a financial planner can provide valuable insights and guidance. 

These resources can offer expert advice tailored to your specific situation and help you both make informed decisions about your finances.

Final Thoughts About Financial Relationship Questions

Asking these questions – having this conversation about money – can be difficult.

It’s important for the future of your finances and relationship to regularly communicate about your thoughts and situation with regard to money.

If your spouse is overspending, here are tips and strategies on how to stop your husband or wife from continuing this spending problem in your marriage.

Related Articles about Money Questions for Married Couples:

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